I'll take seconds, please.

"I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much." -Mother Teresa

After sifting through loads of quotes made by this incredibly awe-inspiring woman, I sat here and laughed at this statement. When she made it, I have no idea if she ever intended this to be humorous, however, it struck me funny when I read it because it applied to my current situation.

I've been learning so much lately... Experiencing a lot of spiritual oppression. It's not stress, because I don't believe in it. :) I always said, "stress is just another way of saying you have poor time management." I still think it to be true, but oh how we confuse the two: spiritual oppression and stress. We don't want to overspiritualize situations in our lives, but it's not always overspiritualization, it's merely just a spiritually antagonistic reality.

In church this morning, the pastor said, "If you are following a God-given vision, you will inevitably face opposition." "Heck yes you will," I thought to myself. Upon that, I was thinking of everything that has possibly gone wrong lately or at least caused some sort of worry. The people that have spoken ill of what I am doing or even not believed that my heart was right. Comparing myself to Nehemiah's opposition he faced when rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem, I felt pretty encouraged. He prayed for strength. "Strengthen my hands, God."

All I want is for God to strengthen my mind. Strengthen my will to push forward in the face of lies. Strengthen my faith to believe in myself and my calling. I can't allow the situations of today to define how tomorrow will be, because tomorrow will worry about itself.

For some reason, if we get down, we lose our faith in everything around us and the enemy wins. We lose our joy. We lose our will to live life to the best. I know that the devil hates my laughter. Hates my joy. He tries to crush it by the people who hate it most. I referred to it once as my "eternal optimism." It was a despised statement, but I'd like to think that the schemes of the devil are being crushed by my smiles through trials.

I'm learning to let God take care of me. I'm not sinking into laziness or anything, but in the things I cannot control or provide for myself, I'm praying that God would take care of it. It's difficult to do. Especially when you have been provisionally helped by human hands for as long as you can remember. But he is a faithful God, and a Father. He wouldn't give me a stone if I asked for bread.

So I laugh. I smile at my situation and say, "Why, God? Why do you trust me so much?"

I sit back and wait for him to laugh back and say, "Daughter, you are far stronger than you know. I just want you to believe."

...and I think to myself...." if he trusts me enough to give me more to bear, then I'll take seconds, please."