Eyes on the cross, Hands in the air.

So, recently I blogged about the current status of my life. Oh how God can use some things to make you recognize that your present state, no matter how depressing it really is, does not dictate your actions. We choose how we react to things. We can react with our sinful nature (excuses, depression, despair) or our HOPE, which is Christ.

In church Sunday, Pastor was talking about baggage. It was a good message... he left his notes at home, and kinda winged it but maybe it was divine. God used him so much to speak to me. I know that I have let a lot of things really bog me down lately, and now more than ever I was allowing the enemy to control my emotions and feelings and ultimately ruin my walk with the Lord by distracting my gaze on the cross to my problems. I was still in the Word, but the fervor wasn't there. It was only questions of why, why, why.

By nature, I am a ball of joy, love, excitement and encouragement. My anxiety was stealing all of these things and reintroducing old issues I had already previously dealt with in my past. The enemy is so sly in his ways...attacking me in the midst of a place of rest God has given me.

It's time that we start walking in our promises. Waking up and speaking the LIFE of the Word over ourselves from the first moment of consciousness in the morning. Rather than dwelling on what I'm not doing because of all the free time I have right now, I need to be focused more on what I could be doing which is utilizing this time to seek Christ. Seeking God is a journey and job in itself. It is labor. It is hard work. I was selfish to take this time for granted and not see that it is a gift from God. I will learn a new lesson every day, and today I learn to accept what I have and don't lose sight of the goal of discipleship. I want to be distracted by my discipleship.