the ambiguity of love in its distorted state.

My heart is breaking. I can't sleep. I can't think clearly. I'm kept awake by the thought of children suffering around the world for whatever reason: hunger, sickness, prostitution, depression, forced military soldiers.

I'm reading about sex trafficking in Southeast Asia, where hundreds of thousands of little girls are being emotionally and physically scarred, bruised, battered and broken just so that people can make a buck. With tears in my eyes, my heart goes out for them. I wonder why I can't fix it. Why can't God just send me now? I want to help them. I want to rescue them. Save them from this torment.

I want to take the pain away. I want to bear it for them. I want to do something, anything so that they can see the love Christ has for them. I need the words to speak to these children who are broken. How do you reach someone who has only known man to be a self-righteous businessman that puts a dollar amount on a human life? What trust is left in them to believe that a man named Christ, whom they have never known, can show them what true love is. Have they even experienced love before?

The enemy comes against the act of love at any cost because it is so threatening. He keeps us from loving our neighbor because they've wronged us. He prevents us from loving our parents because they didn't raise us properly. He attacks children in such a way so that they can never even define love by man because they've only known him to be evil, and in turn distorts the ability for these children to comprehend and embrace the unconditional love of God.

Angry. I am angry at the enemy. I hate what he is doing to the innocent. To those that are hopeless, helpless and hurting. Help me pray that God would take my passion and desire to help these people and empower me to fully express the love of Jesus to it's fullest when I encounter a situation where love is lost.

written 06.10.2008